JM BENAVIDEZ

As I sat there, holding his heart under the palms of my hands, I thought about the short duration of our relationship. Really we had only been together a few hours, but because of the dreams we had shared, it felt like so much longer. The dream had spoken of a month of dreams and I felt almost like I had really lived all of that time. The feelings I felt for both Amadeus and Zuriel felt so strong and so real. But was it possible I was just letting my emotions run away with me? We had spoken of love and now he was declaring himself as mine, was it wrong to want him this way already? 

Amadeus watched me closely, seeing the depth of my thoughts in my eyes. He brushed my hair back from my face. "Maybe we should join the others in the real world for awhile." I placed his hand over my heart, hoping he could feel its wounded thump at the thought of leaving him just yet. "Don't." I whispered, unable to express the sudden pain I felt. He placed a soft kiss on my lips. "I didn't say I wanted to, just that maybe we should. You look like you have a lot to think about and I want to give you that chance." I sighed softly, exhaling away the ache in my chest. "Before we fell..." I looked back into his eyes and he nodded. "Or better yet, after we fell..." He nodded again. "Before you asked me if I was thinking or feeling..." His eyes met mine and I swallowed the lump in my throat as my mouth suddenly went dry. "What would you have done next?" 

Amadeus closed his eyes, shaking his head. "I don't think that's a good idea." I tilted his head up, brushing my lips against his. "I think, that maybe you should let me do the thinking for the next few minutes." I slid my tongue along his lips, surprised when he opened his mouth just enough to caress my tongue with his own. His eyes met mine and he smiled. "Are you sure you want to give me that much freedom?" I smiled, looking at him through my lashes as seductively as I could. "I'll let you know if I'm not." He brought his mouth to mine again, brushing his wet lips against mine. "I have been showing you much restraint." I nodded, meeting his eyes. "I'm not afraid of you." He smiled against my lips. "I never thought you were dearest." I brushed my tongue against his lips again. "I'm waiting." I whispered, taunting him.

Amadeus placed his hands on my knees and ran them up my thighs very slowly. "Such an impatient little temptress." He breathed against my lips, sending shivers up my spine. He slid his hands around my hips to my backside, cupping my rear with both his hands and looking into my eyes. "I would have done this." I inhaled sharply as he pulled me against him so that my womanly vee fit snug against his aching desire. He slid his hands up to my waist, slipping his hands under the hem of my tank top and brushing his fingers across my bare skin. I wrapped my arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer as I kissed him. Encouraged by my lack of retreat, he ran his hands further beneath my top, placing the palms of his hands on my sides and pulling me against him as he returned my kiss. I moaned as his hard shaft flexed against my womanly folds as he pulled me closer. 

He broke our kiss, nuzzling under my chin, once again placing kisses down my throat as he slid his hands up to my ribs. He leaned back, looking into my eyes and fisting his hands in the bottom of my shirt. I blinked once as he slowly lifted my shirt higher, when I raised my hands over my head, he pulled it all of the way up and set it on the couch beside us. A low groan escaped Amadeus' lips as he ran his eyes over my exposed skin. I was grateful I had opted for a more feminine black bra with scalloped lace edges. He leaned forward, placing kisses along the curve of my breasts, running his hands back down my ribs to my waist. "Such soft, pale skin, so dainty and lovely." He murmured as he trailed kisses back up to my collarbone, before wrapping his arms around my waist and pulling me against him. 

I sighed contentedly as our bare skin touched and he smiled. "Still thinking over there?" I smiled and nodded. "Yes, but why are you?" He smiled back. "I have to while I can." I shook my head. "If this is you thinking, I wonder..." I leaned forward, exhaling loudly into his ear. "What would it be like if you lost control?" Amadeus leaned back biting his bottom lip and looking into my eyes. "Are you asking me to show you?" I leaned forward, nibbling his bottom lip with my teeth as he had done. "What if I was? Would you?" He closed his eyes, focusing on what he was feeling. "Only if you really meant it." I slid my tongue over his bottom lip. "Look at me." He opened his eyes, meeting mine. There was so much desire in his eyes that it was hard to breathe, but it didn't make me feel all crazy like I did when Zuriel looked at me that way. It did however; make me want more of him.
"Show me." Two little words that meant everything. Amadeus sat very still as he replayed my words in his head. "Just because you ask me to show you, doesn't mean that you can't change your mind. You are always in control. Just say the word and I'll stop." I kissed his lips softly. "I trust you and if I feel you are going too far, I'll tell you." He patted my hips. "Then let me up." I raised an eyebrow but then sat up on my knees before throwing my leg over his so that I was kneeling beside him. He got up onto his feet and then held his hand down to me. Confused by his actions, I placed my hand in his and let him help me up onto my feet. "I refuse to continue to molest you out here on this hard ass floor." 

I smiled at his sudden change in tone; that was the Amadeus I had always been used to. He raised an eyebrow at me. "What?" I giggled, wrapping my arms around his neck. "For the first time all day, that sounded like the Amadeus I grew up with." He smirked and wrapped his hands around my waist, pulling me closer. "I'm still here." I looked up into his self assured gaze. "Maybe the two of you can find a common balance." He lifted me so that my feet dangled a few inches above the floor and slowly walked me backwards towards my bedroom. "Maybe you just need to stop trying to figure me out long enough to see there is only one side to me." I sighed breathlessly. "And what side would that be?" He placed a soft kiss on my lips as he walked me through my bedroom door. "Yours."  

He cast me a sultry smile and gently dropped me on the edge of the bed. I raised my eyebrows and kicked off my flip flops as he placed a knee on the bed beside me, crawling over me as I scooted back on the bed. Amadeus gripped the back of my neck firmly, pulling me up towards his lips as he straddled my lap and wrapped his other arm around my back. "And you Meira, are you mine?" He brought his mouth close, breathing against my open lips as he spoke. I looked up into his eyes. "I want to be, will you make me?" He smiled, pulling gently at my bottom lip. "To any extent you desire." He placed a soft kiss on my chin again, tilting my head back as he pushed me backwards against the bed. He placed his hands on my hips, running them up my ribs and drawing my arms up over my head as he lowered his chest towards me. He pressed his palms against mine, lacing our fingers together as he straightened his legs, lowering his hips. 

I closed my eyes, tilting my head back as the centers of our needs met. I tried not to imagine how he would feel without so many layers of clothes between us, but the delicious pressure of his hard shaft made it impossible not to. I wrapped my ankle around his calf, lifting my hips and rocking against him as he lowered his chest to mine. He moaned deeply, placing his mouth to mine as he exhaled the sound against my lips. I raised my other ankle, brushing my calf high up high thigh and pulling him tighter against my aching folds. He gripped my thigh roughly, pressing against me as I whimpered against his lips. His eyes met mine, saying what his mouth did not. He wanted to make sure I was still with him, in the moment but not lost in it. I smiled, nudging his head back with a kiss as I trailed kisses down his throat. "I'm still here." I whispered and he groaned as I ran my tongue over his collarbone. 

I pressed on his shoulder, rolling him over onto his back and straddled his hips. He gripped my waist as I smiled down at him, splaying my hands across his chest. "So all of this is mine." I murmured thoughtfully, drawing my lips down to his chest. I trailed kisses all over his skin, occasionally running my tongue along his ribs or the waist of his shorts, kneading him with my hands as I explored him. Amadeus hummed softly in agreement, caressing my head affectionately. I crawled back up his body, laying beside him and smiling into his face. He turned towards me, caressing my cheek as he kissed me sweetly. My desire for him still buzzed beneath my skin, but the fear of losing control had vanished from my mind. I knew where I was and who I was with him. 

There was a knock on my front door and I smiled up at Amadeus. "We don't have to answer it." He smiled back. "Did you lock the door?" I shook my head. "No, I've never needed to." He motioned towards my state of undress as the front door slowly opened. "Hello?" I felt a combination of panic and relief at the sound of Zuriel's voice. Amadeus held out his hand calming me and quickly stood up, walking calmly into the bedroom doorway, leaning casually against the jamb. "Hey, what's up?" I could only imagine the expression on Zuriel's face as I heard him stifle a laugh and clear his throat. "I'd say you, but I think that's beside the point." 

Amadeus crossed his ankle and placed his hand on his hip, refusing to let Zuriel's comment outwardly affect him. If I hadn't just spent the past hour with him I may have considered it a sign of arrogance or dominance, but I knew he was affected by the comment the same way I was. I looked down at my bra and shook my head, a little annoyed by Zuriel's comment and my lack of shirt. I stood up from the bed and Amadeus turned towards me, preparing to stop me when I pushed my way past him. "If you've got something to say Zuriel, you can say it to me. But don't you dare try to make him feel bad for how he feels about me." Zuriel shook his head, holding up his hands at my instant fury. "Whoa, I was just teasing, I didn't mean anything by it." He raised his eyebrows as he saw my state of dress for the first time. I stalked across the room, grabbing my tank top and pulling it over my head. "So, was there a reason for your visit?" I asked, still furious. He shook his head. "Sorry, I got distracted." He smiled. "You didn't have to change on my account." I narrowed my eyes. "You have to earn that privilege." 

Amadeus crossed the room, placing his hand on my shoulder. "Easy Meira, before you say something you don't mean. He obviously wasn't trying to come off the way he did." Zuriel dropped his hands, his shoulders drooping as well. "I didn't mean to interrupt. I just came to let you know they've opened up the lounge and dance hall. They plan on having the carnival up a few hours before sunset." He turned towards the door. "I'll leave you alone. I'm really sorry I upset you." I sighed and held out my hand. "Zuriel stop." He paused with his hand on the doorknob and I crossed the room, wrapping my arms around his waist and laying my cheek on the back of his shoulder. He wrapped his arms around mine, hugging me back.  

I slid around to the front of him, refusing to let go. I looked up into his face. "This is us, we have feelings and emotions just like you do. While you can joke like that outside with the others, you can't in here." He nodded looking down at me. "I'm sorry, I wasn't really thinking about it." I nodded. "That's one of the problems I have with you. You act before you think. While it's not always a bad thing, it makes it harder on those who love you." I released his waist and placed my hands on his cheeks, forcing him to look into my eyes. "I have a hard enough time trying to feel comfortable around you, please don't make it worse. I need you to back off and slow down." 

I pulled him closer to me and I kissed him, willing him to understand the things my emotions scrambled in my head. He was timid in his return of my kiss and I leaned back looking up at him. "Do you remember what I said near the end of our dream last night?" He nodded and I smiled. "When I said it was all or nothing, that goes for you too." He nodded again and I wrapped my arms around his neck, pressing my body against him. "Now kiss me like you mean it." He paused and looked down at me curiously. "How is that backing off and slowing down?" I shook my head laughing. "I meant backing off the teasing and to slow down and think before you speak." He hesitantly wrapped his arms around my waist, looking down at me. "That wasn't all you were talking about." Amadeus picked up his shirts and pulled them on. "Why don't I give you two some time to talk this out?" He patted my arm softly. "I'll see you guys when you're done. Take your time." His eyes met mine and he bent down, placing a soft kiss on my cheek. "Don't be so hard on him." He whispered in my ear before slipping out the door before I could argue.